Home is wherever Im with you!!!!

29 Aug

Dedicated to those who I care about, you know who you are.

Home, for someone like me, the idea of a steady home may seem strange. Given the fact that my political organizing means i travel alot, and like to be the one who finds people, as opposed to the one to be found, to someone else the idea of home and Julian are an oxymoron.

To me the word home means a place where I feel save and loved, and before my moms death, whether I lived in Guelph, Stratford, Inuvik, Toronto etc. Whenever I would visit my mom that was where my home was. A place where I could let my guard down, be myself, say what I actually think and know that I am cared about.

After my g20 arrest, getting bailed out and being forced to live in Kitchener with my mom, and later my dad, 2 months later after her death, My parents house in Kitchener was forced to be my home. My legal address, where the cops could come and find me whenever they wanted.

After my moms death, that house no longer felt like home. Not that I dont love my dad, I really do and try my best to help (and sometimes irritate) him, but it no longer feels like home.

The living room where she always use to hang out is now emptier, the halls where we would debate and sing songs, now seem quietly silent (unless its me making the noise), and the backyard where her and my grandma use to garden is now overrun with weeds.

Some important person once said that you can never go back home (i dont remember his name, nor do I give a fuck) and in some ways he is right. As much as I love my dad I could never go back to that home, as it was, nor will that building ever feel like home.

To me home is when I come to kick it and no matter how sad I am or no matter what I am facing I am greeted with a hug, a smile and if I am lucky a cup of wine or something harder. Home is that place where we sit down, watching something corny like buffy and cheer for spike, or watch really stupid horror movies and make fun of the protaganist cause they are two stupid to escape and let themselves be killed by a bunch of kids.

Home is where no matter what we sit outside, I smoke like chimney and no matter how broke I am there is always a pepsi with ice. Home is where we cook food and am made fun of cause all my foods are hotsauce, cheese tomatos and mayonaise.

Home, to me is the place where I know I am safe and loved, home is wherever Im with you.


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