Eternal Night

1 Aug

Its not uncoomon for people to say KKKanada is one of the best countries on th earth.Given what i hear and deal with on a daily basis
one would have to take the position of the catheri of old , which is that we here on earth live in hell where the devil is king.Yesterday
, desite some ammusing and huge screw ups on my part on the internet, was no diffrent then any other day in Kitchener, which my friend likes to say must be on the hellmouth (buffy fans will know what im talking about.)

From dealing with friends who are taking care of there loved ones who have survived serious sucide attempts, to evictions, toacts of police barbarism, one could clearly see how fucked up the system we live in is and to a certain extent how pointless and futile it feels, fighting one symptom of this disease to have five more crop up.
By three o clock in the afternoon, feeling exhausted, overwhelmed and in many ways defeated, a friend knocked on my door, to go over his case.
Page after page his case, like so many others i see is full of fuckery, racism injustice and at the end of the day hopelessness. Feeling that if only the right people knew what was happenning, this injustice could be corrected, like those that would hopelessly petition the czars of old, I didnt have the heart to tell him he was fucked.I told him that his battlle will be long and hard and that i would stick by him, which is true,
but i didnt tell him, that like all other denizens living in this kingdom of suffering and pain, his only proper outlook would to read the writing on the gate “abandon hope all yeah who enter here”.

Case work, mobalizing people to deal with fucked up landlords and others that screw us over can sometyimes be fullfilling, but is very draining, the evils of the sytem are no longer something abstract, but rather something concrete, the woman with three kids getting thrown on the street, the single mother having her child stolen by CAS because of an eviction, docters who see there patients as a commodity and case file due to the fact that they are overworked
and forcefully discharging them leaving them to fend for themselves in s sytem that feeds itselves on our pain and misery. Dealing with this tuff on a case by case basis, one either becomes desensitised, angry or falls into dispair, or a micture of all three.
It seems thatr we go from crisis to crisis, with no hope in sight.

Its four oclock now and its time to implement our free food program, I ask my friend how much cash do you have, he says nothing, shit i only have twenty dollars and need 40 more to go to Toronto to deal with my legal shit etc., my otrher friends are also broke even though they work 40 hours a week
in a bullshit factory job, that can pay as low as they want because if workers organize or ask for better pay they have no trouble firing the trouble makers. I give my friend my last twenty, and tell him to go to a friendly pizza store and see how many he can get, while I hide in the corner. The owner knows its for the people program that im involved in
but im too embarressed to show my face.

The weather reflects my dark mood, rain and grey skys and a old that chills you to the bone. We set up shop and people start coming up and talking to us and they are pissed off.
From woman who lose there place to people pissed at the nine bullets that took sammys life, to those dealing with constant harrasm,ent evryone wants to fight back. The spirit
among the people is not one of defeat and despair but rather resistance and anger. One guy who i know is totally broke but he insisted in donating five dollars, the group is like use that to help you get to toronto, and im laughing.
Despite the fact that this week we have no literature, we become walking flyers discussing and talking politics. One security guard whose role is to remove us due to the ban of handing out political stuff on city property comes and jokes with us.

Thus guy who is really annoying comes and asks us what we think lof his new hair, which looks just like his old hair and i make a quite joke to my friend “some people are agent provacteurs and some are just fucken annoyying”reffering to the bait set up at our last serving where this guy was spouting fucken shit waiting for us to react with the cops just around the corner.
Every person as an individual fighting the behometh of the sytem or uynder attack by trhemselves is sad and desperate, but when we get together. these cases based on direct action case work show the people the significance of resistance, and in this age of repression and austerity, the anger of the people, politicized is not something that will crush us, but rather a new hope, like the sun coming up over the horizen after a drak stormy night, saying that not 0only is another world possible, but necessary!!!

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