talking to a taxi driver about my mom

16 Aug

Im sitting outside the store at 5 30 am having a coffee and a smoke, when a Romanian taxi driver showed up.(this conversation is in Romanian so some of the swear words i changed to english so the reader can understand them better) What are you doing here he said? having a coffe and a smoke, bullshit he said, your waiting to find some fascists because of the other night and carry out some ill thought plan where you will either get arrested or get beaten better. What do you know about what happenned i said, i saw your two friends run away and you walk home with a bloody nose crying. I was there by myself I said, you can lie to others to cover up the cowardise of your friends but you cant lie to me. My did go anyways, needed smokes i said and didnt trust the person who was staying at my house cakkedd my friends cause i didnt want to go by myself. So your admitting they ran away, fuck off I said. Now what your going to take on five six people by yourself by just standing here what if they dont come, I will wait all day.

You have a radio show, and meetings to prepare for tommorrows demonstration but if you are so stuck up that you would throw that out the window for some stupid not well thought out plan of revenge thats your fault, did you even tell anyone you are here, no i came to enjoy the coffee, you are such a bad lier Julian, your mom was right,

What do you mean, I asked, that your are very smart and intelligent but once you get a stupid idea in yoiur head, espicially if it is mtivated by the need to “prove a point” argueing with you is like talking to a wall.

This is from the woman who use to threaten to shot drug dealers if they talk to her kids I respond, he starts laughing, she said you got her stuborness from her.

I light a smoke, tell me about her i think you only know her from here. I use to drive her to court and the hospital and other places and of all her children, she worried about you the most? Why I asked, she thought you were a romantic and a idealist, mix that with your activism and you have a recepy for disaster. Yeah she always wanted me to write, said i had the heart of a poet, but I hate peotry and I am a materialist, like Lenin.

He starts laughing, you are the son of two poets, of course your an idealist. Poetery, all that got my parents was shitty jobs washing toilets after the rich. She told me once that what she wants from her children is not to think like her, just to think, and except for moments like now, I think she did a very good job of raising you.

Yeah theres not many mothers out there who teach there children songs like bella choia and bandera Rosa, she use to sing those songs to me when i would be stuck at home to brighten my spirits as well as tell me storys of 1968. The main reason she left was not just so you could have a good life or her love her for your dad but vecause she could not stand the corruption and opprtunism that was rank in Romania at the time. Yeah she always complained about the bootlickers and told me how opportunistic x (a relative was) who back in the day wrote poems praising the glory of the party and now is calling themselves one of the biggest anti communist.

She had a heart of gold I said I remember she use to alwys bail out my friends until the courts made it clear that from now on she could only bail her her family, and whenever my friends needed a place to stay, i had a trick i wouldnt call mincase my dad answered but would just bring them home and she would feel bad and hide them in the basement, and get me to sneak them food and wake them up before my dad could see them and though she would deny that she was political that sort of conciousness never to turn your back on someone in need as well as contempt for corruption and sympathy for priosners makes her more political then 1000 marxists who just sell papers and sloganeer.

speaking of which, he said is it true that you use to chase her around with the collected works of stalin making her read them until one day she snapped and said i only met two real communists fanatics in my whole life and one of them was you? I started laughing, no it was an essay calledd anarchism or socialism and it was very well written, and she said i was just as bad as my grandma chasing people with bible and making them listen, and for a so called athiest who critisizes people for only reading the bible, i am just as obsessed as a mormon with my books, we both start laughing. Do you want a drive home, nahh i can walk i need to think, dont worry the fight is all out of me.

I started walking and lit me fifth ciggerrette in an hour and started to think about my mom. Many people always talk about political people and there sacrifices out of context, as if there suffering is there own and they grew up in a vaccuumm. I look at all my old friends who ended up getting involvd in stupid things who grew up in the same enviroment as me, and realise the diffrence between me and them is not that I am better or smarter but I had a mother whom loved and sacrificed everything for me, and that has made all the diuffrence.


One Response to “talking to a taxi driver about my mom”

  1. Apahidean Adela September 7, 2013 at 10:53 pm #

    Pentru noi, romanii de azi, comunismul este cea mai mare nenorocire pe care am trait-o, poate stii de serialele din memorialul durerii, daca ai rabdare vizioneaza cateva

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