I go to a friends house as I am out of coffee and have no internet and such and of course they have a grand esspresso/ latte machine plus they generally kick ass and such, and we make our, or should I actually say my coffee and spark up a smoke.
She is bringing me up to date on all that has been going on in Kitchener since I have been gone and is telling me about the loss of three people from the heroine epedemic, how a friend of ours didn’t get an apartment due to the fact that the window overlooks the dumpster where the body of their friend was found, NAZIS handing out leaflets door to door on Nov. 11 and as we continue to discuss the current on the ground material reality I realise why it is now the hate crime capital and called the second worst place to move to etc.
She asks me if I have heard from a friend that we both know who she is concerned for, i told her I have not spoke to him in a bit and she is telling me that he looks right skinny and dodgy in his fb photos which may mean he’s back on the meth. We chat a bit more and I ask for a smoke for the road and start walking downtown.
I see some one bugging out on meth, a right fucked up tweaker, and as I continue to walk down King St. I see old friends with track marks huddling in a doorway to escape the cold, there eyes are glazed and its clear they are nodding off unaware of there surroundings. I meet my friend for a coffee at the commons and am literally asking myself what draws me to this city, why am I so invested in this city, am I just banging my head against the wall? Wasting my time and energy and like Sisyphus pushing a rock just to have it role down again?
I go to chat with some friends from out of town and we are are just talking what the agenda is for the work we set for ourselves for this coming year and he is like it must be amazing living there, the shit you guys do and can pull off as well as the support that you guys have, and I smirk and squish my eyes like what this person says is crazy, but he presses the point to me look at the community, where else can you walk down the street and just grab ten people at random and be like do you want to take over the minister of social services office and they are like sound and actually know what they are doing, where else do you have a situation where you have the level of political education that exists among street youth, where else do you have the sense of community and comradery that you do here. I reply that all this shit comes at a really high cost.
I go on my way and think about something i heard the other day, through damnation lies freedom. We are fucked, we have nothing really to lose and as such we are free. We can pull of crazy shit in defence of our rights because crisis creates necessity and necessity creates theory that leads to action. The contradictions are so apparent that there is no sandpapering them and you don’t have to be a weatherman to see which way the wind is blowing, The shitty conditions and lack of support from the state creates a vaccum that needs to be filled, it is clear that things cant go on the way they are going, and the combination of these material conditions is an explosive combination that allows those who are willing to act with analysis to actually have an impact and make real change and I guess that’s what draws my to Kitchener. Let others have there theory or discussions or pandering to the students, I will take Kitchener organizing any day because it is real, it is grimmy and you can catually impact change without compromising your principles or sandpapering the contradictions.